June 18, 2016

A man used to sit every morning by a pond full with mostly beautiful orange koi fish. He would sit and mediate, he would sit and feel sorry for the fish,  for they had a miserable existence. They had a life (whatever life they had) and they would waste it there swimming around with no direction. 

"You would never see the oceans or the rivers? Each one of you is a poor fish, you would never get to see the wonders of the waters, nor the creatures that amazingly wander the depths its skirts, nor the reflection of the stars at night on a big layer of inconstant brightness. Poor fish! You were made to be free, you were given an ocean so big that by the end of your life you wouldn't even get to know it all, and yet you're here in this pond, serving as an artifact, an ornament, a mere source of meditation for a mere man like me. I feel so sorry for you!"

 

"Please don't." Responded a big ugly white catfish that would always swim at the bottom. "You think you come and contemplate us, but is really us who contemplate you. Each morning we get lost in the deep sea of your eyes, and we feel sorry for you. 

We feel sorry because you have the whole world to reflect on, and yet you decide to reflect on such small pond. We feel sorry because man has put us here, but no one puts you anywhere, you were given the whole wolrd and you live up to your littleness in everything you do. So much greatness wasted! You're the one in a small pond! You're the one afraid to go beyond the ocean... no one stops you, but you DECIDE to stop. 

And when you say you feel sorry for us,  is not sorrow you feel but envy. You envy the little freedom we have to be great in any water we have been called to swim. We were put here in such little pond with no way out, but if we die we die swiming, no one can ever say we  stopped being fishes.

We live up to what we are... and you? You are put into a small pond in your life and you drown ... Because thats what men do, they stop doing what they were made to do when their waters don't flow...they stop being humans, they stop hoping, they stop praying. We feel sorry for you, and we meditate on you who were given the world but in such little pond decide to live."

Brothers and Sisters in Christ, If I had to "update" my current situation I would say "living in a pond...and not even swimming or a fish..." I believe we were created for greatness, and whatever little situation we are going through is not what we were created for, so is not the end, and whatever we do we should never stop doing what we were created for: praising God (just keep swimming!).  However I wish I could take my own reflections sometimes, and because God knows I am full of inconstant brightness He  provides me with what I need: his Gospel of life.

It is hard to read Gospels like today's and firmly say: "God would provide" "Everything is Ok" when you're the one in need and have a material reality... or any reality. But as I reflect on fishes and ponds, I can see how my real needs are not really material, I can see how he has taken many things away from me so that I can ask him again and again and one day be given these things out of his mercy. Things that I don't even deserve. 

And if you feel like I do today, isn't it great? To know we are not alone, we are not the only ones trapped in a pond with an ugly white cat fish. 

A quote from my favorite book The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry beautifully says that "it is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye."

Sometimes we concentrate in the material realities of our lives, that we lost sight of the real spiritual needs God would always provide for. We are alive!!! What better gift than to be alive!!! The same way He provides fish their water, he provides us with life...and his love that is invisible to our eyes. 

Frassati NY